Insomnia at 2AM on day 36 (I think) of Covid Quarantine: A Covid Selfie

That face. My face - caught at the moment of a ‘point of the spear’ decision. Day 62 (I think) of Covid curfews and movement resections in my community; day 36 (I think) of a 24/7 home covid quarantine that would eventually drag on for several more weeks - alone, isolated, my husband ‘stuck’, riding out the covid travel banns at our daughter’s ouse on the other side of the planet. It was 2am in the morning of three, or was it four consecutive nights of insomnia. I gave up on getting any sleep and got up. Turing on the light, A stranger met me in the mirror - a woman on the edge. Do I crawl back in bed and cry? Do I break down and shut off? Do I succumb to hysterical laughter? Then, a subtle familiar expression flit across the face of that stranger in the mirror my and I saw That Face - my mother. Her compassionate yet no-nonsense-allowed-here “Mom look” in my own face. I realised the only true option was to stand up straight, throw my shoulders back and “keep on keepin’ on! She had thought me in my youth that regardless of any external events happening around me, good or bad, I am responsible for how I choose walk the path before me. She would expect me to walk it well, and to make the path better for those coming on behind me. And then, in my own face I began to see the wrinkles and creases of resilience and determination and laughter and joy that define my memories of her face, my mother - my friend. As of today (8/29/2020) covid inspired restrictions continue to hem in all about me. Nevertheless, I choose to define my own path - I choose to “keep on keepin’ on” with accountability and compassion for myself and others. Thanks Mom.